Sunday, October 15, 2006

Your mission, should you choose to accept it...

Rather ironically, shortly before this whole deception thing blew up on my blog, I made a succesful pitch to Cahoots magazine for an article on blogging and how meaningful relationships can be built on blogs. I haven't given up on the story, even though it will now include a short section on how, just like in real life, some relationships can be precariously built on deception.

I already have the centrepiece of the article, but I need a few supporting quotes and ideas from people who have found that their blogs have helped them build meaningful relationships with people who show them compassion and support. I'm particularly interested in how blogs might help you work through difficult experiences or phases in your life - like tragedy, mental illness, postpartum depression, rough parenting times, etc.

So here's what I'm proposing - if you're interested in providing a response, I'd like you to answer a few questions (either as a post on your blog, a comment here, or in an email to me). I can't promise I'll include all of you - if alot of people jump in, I'll have to pick and choose the quotes I need to support the article. But whether or not I use what you write, I'm still very interested in reading it.

Here goes with the questions: (Feel free to answer all or just one or two.)

1. Why did you start blogging?

2. Do you feel that you've developed meaningful relationships on your blog? If so, tell a story or two of a relationship that made a difference to you. How are these relationships different and/or similar to your in-person relationships?

3. Have you used your blog as a place to work out tough situations in your life? If so, what was the situation/challenge, and how did the blog help?

4. Were there people you met through blogging who helped you through those tough situations? What did they do that helped?
5. Were there ever things that you felt you could talk about on your blog to "strangers" that you couldn't tell your flesh-and-blood friends and family?

6. Do your family and "in-person" friends read your blog? Why or why not?

7. Have you ever regretted admitting really personal things on your blog? Why or why not?

8. Have you come into conflict with anyone on your blog? Did it destroy a relationship that you valued, or was it someone you didn't care about?

9. Do you ever think about quitting blogging? Why or why not?

10. Any other interesting stories that might be applicable?

Thanks in advance. If you write something, please leave me a comment or send an email so I know about it. Also, I'd appreciate knowing if you're willing to share your real name for the article and the address of your blog.

And I'm going to have to assume, for the purpose of the article, that you're telling the truth! :-)


Liz said...

My husband started our blog after our good friend, Linda, started one back in 2003 (she has since quit blogging, but I haven't come close to quitting, ever). We had never heard of blogging but my husband loved the idea of it. He set it up, named it, wrote the first entry and then....nothing. I got so disgusted that I took over and it's been mostly mine ever since.

I have found that there's a fine line between what I can say about my teen girls and what I can't say. My youngest has given me ideas about what to write about her, but I have had to draw the line at too much information when it's a personal matter for them.

We originally started it to keep our real life friends up-to-date on our lives, but I have found that they visit and don't comment as much as my "blogging" friends. I think that's because they are afraid they will sound "stupid" in comments, mostly because we are the only bloggers they know. No one in my real life family knows about our blog. Not that I am ashamed of it, I just don't want to feel like I have to edit myself, which I know I would if I thought my parents were reading it.

I'd say the most personal thing (besides my kids) I have blogged about is my friend Wendy's death. It helps me to work through feelings about it and I have had a lot of support from my "real" friends and my blogging friends. I'm proud that I got Wendy's husband (and my friend) Mike to start a blog so that he has an outlet to write about her and their son.

Good luck on your article Heather!

Anonymous said...

Hi Heather, I answered in a post because I'm a slacker and I didn't have anything to write about. ;)

wordgirl said...

I think about quitting sometimes, but it's rare. I get too much out of it. I'd love for money to be one of those things and maybe it will happen soon. In the meantime, I've made some fabulous friends.

Irene S said...

I started blogging because I found friends from Winnipeg who were blogging and thought it would be a great way to keep in touch. And I love to journal and look back.
Well I am getting to know my Winnipeg friends better.
Yup my parents and husband read my blog. That gets me into trouble at times but nothing too serious.
That it for now. May come back.
And yes I am a real person and tell the truth. Bits of my life here ;)

Anonymous said...

I started blogging because deep down inside, I'm an exhibitionist. I also like to write, and I also thought that it would be great to have a place to say things I'd never say out loud in real life. However, I can't keep a secret to save my life, so I had to abandon the Showing The Ugly Side approach. I blog for fun. Sometimes God nudges me to blog about something and then I do, but mostly it's a fun place to be flippant, and also to tell kid stories.

I have not made meaningful friendships through blogging. I've done the Bonding with Strangers Through the Internet in a different forum, a lifetime ago, and it Will. Not. Happen. Again.

Also I blog to make it look like I'm working on novel at midnight, poor tortured Must-Write-It-Down die person that I am.

Michele said...

keep meaning to get to this. when is your deadline?

BarnGoddess said...

I accepted your mission and you can read my post here:


This was an interesting subject about blogging!

Swampwitch said...

First of all, I love your template. I need someone to help me with mine, as I know nothing about html or how to change.
Second, your deadline may have already passed, but I would be happy to answer your questions. How do I e-mail you? I couldn't find the address... DUH?
My address is

Swampwitch said...

I just decided to answer here. I hope that's ok...
1) I had never seen a blog until August 10, 2006. The idea of blogging intrigued me, so my cousin helped me get started. My first story in my August Archives:
"Globbing: How Do I Start" explains this question more fully. It was my hope to learn enough so that by October, I could post information about Breast Cancer Awareness.
2)Many bloggers have instructed me on how to upload pictures, how to add a link, how to work with two screens at once, and so on. Just last evening, my blog totally disappeared. Whoosh ! Gone ! Just a blank, white page. Three bloggers sent personal e-mails on what to do. I never imagined that I would form a friendship on the Internet. Not only has that happened, but my husband and I met a fellow blogger and her husband just last week in Oklahoma. What a pleasure that was! I posted their pictures just yesterday, sort of.
3) Thank goodness, since I started blogging just several weeks ago, I've not had any tough situations occur. If/When that happens, I doubt I will share it. I did share My Journey of Survival with My Readers and tomorrow will post a picture of myself having my head shaved due to Chemotherapy.
4)As I mentioned above, several bloggers have helped me with circumstances but I would not label them a tough situations.
5)No, contrary to what I've shared so far about things in the past, I doubt I would share with my blogger friends something that was happening in the present. Today's post is a promise I made to our son-in-law who is stationed in Iraq that I have shared, but I wanted as many people as possible to send best wishes for him to read.
6) Yes, my family reads my blog occasionally, but they seldom post a comment. I know they are there. I have a site meter. My oldest daughter has commented that if she starts a blog, it will be titled, "Oh My Goodness, My Mom Has a Blog." (Actually she said, Oh My God My Mom Has a Blog...but I was taught not to say that, so I didn't want to offend anyone.)
7) No, I've not admitted anything to my knowledge that I should regret.
8) I have dyslexia and it is very difficult to type words correctly. This is taking me a long time because I mix my letters up. I'm a pretty good speller but my fingers and brain don't always cooperate with each other. Consequently, 95% of the time I type glob, globbing, globber instead of blog. I use that word most of the time because I find myself having to correct the spelling. Unfortunately, I offended a blogger named Willowtree and he chastised me for using GLOB. He told me GLOB was not an acronym and if I continued to use it, he would erase my comments. The next day, I posted my Globtionary with many Globbing terms, including:
G enuine
L ove
O f
B Blogging
He has never posted on my Glob since. I even apologized to him.
To my knowledge, that's the only person who seemed to have a conflict with me.
9) Yes, I considered quitting last evening when my glob disappeared. Nothing worse than a missing glob.
I don't know how to start a new one but probably would seek out help to do so, eventually.
10) I am having difficulty with allocating a certain amount of time to my glob. I haven't learned time efficiency where it is concerned.
Also, I want a new template and I'm searching for someone to help me. I would, of course, pay them.
Now that I've taken up half-an-acre on your comment page, I should go do something productive.

Swampwitch said...

P.S. I know it's probably not important to anyone but me, but I forgot to mention a "globber friend" who has also helped me.

Pam - Ramblings and Other Things.

Plus, I guess I should mention the name of the "globs" for the others:
Brian - Truth is Freedom
Gayle - My Republican Blog
Julie - Another Chance Ranch
Willowtree - Once Upon a Blog

...Just to give them credit !

Heather said...

Thanks everyone, for accepting the mission. I've got lots of smokin' hot content for my article now. Michele - I'm not sure about the deadline - I just emailed the editor and she hasn't gotten back to me yet.

Swampwitch said...

As you can tell, I'm not only "lysdexic" but very forgetful...somewhere along the way, one of my globber friends decided that my place should be named The GlobAsylum...I can't imagine why ! Thought this was a bit of info I should have included.
When you get tired of me posting, just tell me. :)

Coll said...

I am quiet by nature and often feel that, in conversations.. I tend to listen more than talk. In many ways.. my blog is my voice.. my turn to speak.

Judy said...

I have a post about ready to publish on my blog.

You can find it at

Anybody Home - www.judyh58.blogspot.com


juniper68 said...

posted about this at my place:

Joyce said...

I did it too, if you care to read it.

Swampwitch said...

Is there an award for the blogger who postest the mostest times?
If so, I win.
I had to come back and toot my horn just a little...I am giggle-happy at my place.
Rob bestowed the Blog of the Day on me yesterday and I just about fell out of my chair when I saw it. Forgive me for cheering on your blog, but considering I have never seen a blog until August, I'm pretty happy. Thanks for listening, again.

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