Wednesday, October 25, 2006

Sometimes the words of a song say it best...

I've seen a lot and a lot I've seen
Hope I never stop dreaming if you know what I mean
Sometimes it all ends in disarray
Sometimes I feel myself slipping away

My soul's asleep, so wake me up
My body's fading, so wake me up
My soul's asleep, come on and wake me up

Baby its subtle and it does it well
I just walk on through underneath that spell
Flashing lights and jamboree
I try to stay awake but I'm drifting away

I've seen a lot and a lot I've seen
Sometimes I fall through the gaps in between
And then the world it begins to sway
Pretty soon I can feel myself slipping away
Wake me up.

- Martyn Joseph

Call it restlessness, call it a "god-shaped hole", call it "a longing for heaven", call it "not ready for winter" blues, call it pms, call it depression, call it a sudden impulse to cry in the mall, call it "losing it over chapstick", call it a deep sadness over an evangelical festival that seems to forget that God is a god of peace and redemption and not just judgement - call it whatever you like - my soul feels asleep these days.

It will wake up soon - it always does - but for now I guess it needs to sleep.


Linda said...

Rest well my friend, rest well.

Anvilcloud said...

I knew where that song came from.

Anonymous said...

I like "god-shaped hole". I understand what you're talking about and I hope you find comfort from your rest.

Liz said...

Gawddd, blogger sucks sometimes! I had a very profound comment...wait...I forgot I copied it! Awesome! Here it is:

I've never heard that song, and I don't know what a god shaped hole is, but I do know that I have felt that same feeling you have going on now. I have written about how walking helps me because I can talk to myself and figure out what is bothering me.

Sometimes the best thing is to forget you are a Mom and go out on a hot date with your husband and pretend that you are just starting dating. It worked for me, at least for the time being. Or do a girls weekend...no kids...no men allowed!

Pamela said...

wake me.... but not until after 9

a good night sleep will feel like heaven and add clarity to this fuzzy mind.

cv23 said...

I hope that you get the rest you need, so that you can feel re charged and ready to go again.. Hearther is case you didn't know this is Christine..

The Passarelli's said...

I have been feeling like that also to the point where I can't seem to want to write about anything on my blog. Sometimes I just need to be alone and devote thinking and missing time to Wendy.

Vicki said...

"call it a deep sadness over an evangelical festival that seems to forget that God is a god of peace and redemption and not just judgement "
::using my best counselor voice:::
Tell me more about that statement.

You have this abiblity to put into words exactly how my days feel like sometimes. Terrific job. Honest Post. Your posts are deep and meaningful. I post on horny goats.

P.S. I'm not a counselor. I'm just nosey.

Joyce said...

well said. sometimes (almost always, actually) we try to hurry up and figure out whats making us feel dark and heavy so that we can rush back into the sunshine.

There are times when we need to be where we are. God made all the emotions, and made them well.

I love your writing.

Stephanie said...

If only the peace would last as long as the restlessness, but unfortunately it doesn't seem to work that way.

Rest well, dear soul. And as the psalmist David implores: "Be still and know that I am God." Why oh why must learning to be still be so difficult?

Gina said...

Oh Heather, I am sorry that you are feeling like this.

I hope you and your heart feel better soon.

Cuppa said...

Curl up under your blankie and rest. Sending you a hug to wrap yourself in too.

Anonymous said...

Will Blogger actually let me comment today? We shall see, we shall see.

This.. mysterious soul sickness.. it's going around.

I hope we both figure it out.. soon.


Joyce said...

Marnie- "Mysterious soul sickness" sums it up so well.
Is God big enough for all of us?

Dale said...

May the peace of Christ be with you, Heather.


Jenny said...

I live my life in this place.

I hope you find youself again.