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Friday, May 04, 2007

It says Fumbling for WORDS, you idiot!

To the hormonal teenager who found my blog by googling fumbling her boobs, step AWAY from the computer, go find a soccer ball to kick around the backyard with your friends, and get a REAL life! You won't find the naughty pictures you're looking for on THIS site!

The same goes for whoever was googling skinny-dip. Believe me when I tell you, there is no web cam dangling over the sorority sisters backyard pool ANYWHERE on this site.

And if you were trying to find out how skimpy can your bathing suit be for men and women, well, that just makes me giggle. C'mon, have you SEEN my bathing suit? It would terrify you how much fabric there is. Nope. No skinny-dipping, and NO bikinis here.

As for the person trying to find Moody Manitoba Morning lyrics, well, I may have had a few mornings that feel that way now and then, but I haven't got the lyrics committed to memory. Thanks ALOT though, for making that song (or at least the part I can remember) get stuck in my head ALL afternoon. Next thing you know, I'LL be the one up in the middle of the night trying to find the lyrics because it's driving me stark raving mad just repeating the first line again and AGAIN. If that happens, I will blame you.

Just one more thing... if you are the person who typed it has been my long time dream to build a home studio into the Google search engine, I'm so sorry. Here you go bravely trusting your dream to the internet, hoping some genie will pop out of the bottle and make your dreams come true, and all you got was me. Bummer for you. I hope you get your studio some day. It sounds like a lovely dream.

(Maybe this wasn't such a good idea for a post - now someone's going to find me by googling web cam dangling over the sorority sisters backyard pool.)

11 comments:

Whippersnapper said...

Someone googled the most appalling thing I have ever seen written down in words (really, no lie) and got my site because I had written about you-know-who entering her anal phase. Yeah. Exactly. So gross. I'll have to go edit the post and change it to an*l, that'll keep the sick perverts away!

Karmyn R said...

sometimes its frightening how people find the blogs - there are some serious sickos out there.

Accidental Poet said...

ok how did you find that out????

Judy said...

There is some song that people in Poland like called 'Anybody Home'.

Brings me the most hits.

Liz said...

I never get those fun google searches. These are hilarious!

marnie said...

I'm sensing more inappropriate search words coming your way...

I'll throw one of mine at you:

"my dog ate q-tips"

karla said...

oh Heather. This is FUNNY! I've been randomly keeping track of the funny searches that pop up in my stat counter too. I'll have to remember to post them soon.

Gina said...

That is why I try to keep pics of me and my family off my site! Ay, people are so weird...

Vicki said...

your a hoot!

I had "My Uncle Spanked me." last week.. ?? Hu? Weirdo!

Stephanie said...

Okay, Sweetie!! Sounds like you need to be part of the Testicle Sorority!!

It's SO much fun to get googled for that!!

Erin said...

Your so funny, heather! Your posts always cheer me up and give me a good laugh! I didn't see you yesterday at Church, I missed ya! Saw your hubby, but not you..either I'm blind or non observant or you weren't there! Hope your doing well!!