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Thursday, August 24, 2006

Reality check

Shortly after writing that post about my husband's cooking, I went to pick up some printing, and ran into an old friend I haven't seen in quite awhile. Turns out she's trying to put together the pieces of her life after a hellish year. There can be nothing fun about being forced to move your fifty year old husband into a nursing home because of his rapid decline due to MS. And that was only after she'd struggled to care for him at home while trying to keep herself sane. After too many days of having to run home from work to help him off the floor where he had fallen, she had no other choice.

She describes herself as a married widow. Not only can her husband no longer cook her the kind of meals I've been treated to, he can't even keep her company in her lonely house. He can't go for walks with her, can't travel, can't curl up on the couch with his arm wrapped around her, can't go to movies, and can't please her the way he used to (and this is someone who used to brag about her sex life).

This friend is one of the most vivacious, fun-loving people I know. There is something incredibly unfair about the way her life turned out. Too unfair for words.

9 comments:

Hope said...

MS is a devestating disease, I know a young mom who is struggling with it.
I must remember to be thankful for my family's good health.
Life can be fragile.

Gina said...

One of Hubba-hubba's aunts had to deal with something similar, although it was Parkinson's disease that took her spouse away.

It never does seem fair, does it?

The very nice man said...

How dreadful!! Yet another reminder to count your blessings each and every day and to take nothing for granted.

Liz said...

That's such sad news. Life certainly isn't fair at all.

runny_yolk said...

Hi Heather - this is Nisha from the Cahoots crowd. You can visit my blog at http://losingelphie.blogspot.com

I'm so sorry to hear about your friend...

Dale said...

Heartbreaking. Life is not fair, is it, Heather? I shake my head here and offer thanks for my health.

Anonymous said...

How very sad. Brings to mind our many blessings.

karla said...

When I was in college (for geophysics), we had our own magnetic observatory. My geophysics professor’s wife had MS, and he was involved in medical studies that correlated the earths magnetic field to MS sufferers, which if I remember correctly from our studies, MS occurs most prominently near regions of the equator where the earths magnetic field is most intense.

We used our magnetic observatory to study the effects of the earths magnetic field on MS patients. They recorded the severity of their symptoms which we would compare with the activity and intensity of the earth’s magnetic field.

Our prof actually built an electromagnetic shield around his bed for his wife, and on nights on high electromagnetic activity, was able to use electromagnetism to reduce the effects of her MS symptoms.

All very fascinating, but all so sad at the same time knowing how much people with MS suffer. Eventually some big medical study group took over our little college project and we weren’t allowed to work on it anymore, but maybe, someday, there will be a cure.

I’m very sorry to hear about your friend and her husband. You are right, words just cannot describe how unfair life can be.

Anonymous said...

That just breaks my heart. I don't know what I would do.