Being a mom

Why it’s hard being a mom:
1. Privacy. Just for a change, I’d like to be able to pee without having someone walk in.
2. Time. Some times it feels like I own none of my own time any more. It’s all been usurped by some member of my family or another. Oh how I long for a guilt-free Saturday – to sleep in late, have a leisurely bath without anyone climbing in the tub with me, go hang out in a bookstore or wander around the Village for awhile, maybe stop for a nice supper and a glass of wine at a quiet non-family oriented restaurant, go home and read a book all evening. Oh what a dream!
3. Poop. I’m sick and tired of poop. Poopy diapers, poopy panties, poop, poop, poop.
4. The arguing that never stops. “Mom, she punched me!” “Mom, she took my book!” “Mom, tell her to get out of my room!” “Mom…” Sometimes I’m sure my head will explode.
5. Laundry. Mountains and mountains of laundry. I never liked laundry to begin with, but when there are 5 people in the house, all of them needing clean socks and underwear every day, it feels like laundry rules your life!
6. Too many decisions! “Mom, can I have another piece of cake?” “Mom, can I invite someone over for a sleepover?” “Mom, can I watch TV?” Sometimes, by the end of the day, I’m sure I’ll burst a blood vessel if I have to make ONE more decision!
7. Worry. I never thought I was a worrier, until I had kids. Now there are so many things to worry about. What if they won’t make any friends at school? What if I make too many parenting mistakes and they grow into messed-up adults in need of psychotherapy? What if the bus crashes on the way to school and they get killed or hurt? What if they don’t do well at school and they’ll always feel inferior to their friends? Oh man, I’m sick of worry!
8. Vomit. When they’re sick, they never make it to the toilet or the bucket and I always end up on my hands and knees cleaning up the revolting mess.
9. Sometimes, I SWEAR there’s not an inch of kindness in them. They can be downright MEAN – to me AND to each other. Before I was a mom, I thought it was downright HORRID for a child to tell their mom or dad they hated them. Now it seems almost commonplace.
10. Whining and complaining. “Mom, do we HAVE to have Thai food for supper? I HATE Thai food.” “Mom, how come we never get to buy cocoa puffs cereal?”
11. Barney, Barbie, Mary-Kate and Ashley, Bratz, Hillary Duff – all those annoying mass market products, television shows, pop stars, and movies. They know how to make kids love them (or at least THINK they love them) and if you try to convince the kids the products they’re being sold are crap, they just assume you’re being an old fuddy-duddy.
12. Guilt. I’m sick of feeling guilty (or having my kids TRY to make me feel guilty) every time I do something for myself or go on a date with my husband, or go on a business trip and leave them at home.
13. Money. There’s never enough anymore. Everything costs money. Clothes, backpacks for school, piano lessons, soccer, birthday parties (theirs and their friends’), etc., etc. There’s no end of things that have to be paid for.
14. Baths. I want to have one ALONE sometime.
15. Stuff. There’s just SO much clutter around the house now – so many toys, books, clothes, you name it. There’s always clutter around and just when you get close to cleaning up and having it look a little respectable, they mess it up again.
16. You have to FEED them all the time. Even when you’re not hungry, you have to figure out something for them to eat a million times a day! And when you haven’t had a chance to buy groceries, and all you have available for their snacks is crackers and peanut butter, you never hear the end of it.

Ah yes, sometimes it’s hard. But just now, as I was writing this list of woes, my daughter came to kiss me goodnight, and as I reached out and touched her hair, my heart swelled with love for her. None of this stuff is really that important after all.